Showing posts tagged shorts
This is how I imagine the conceptualization of these shorts occured: Topshop executive 1: Those shaggy sweaters did well for us, but we have this left over fabric.  What should we do with it? Topshop executive 2: What about pants? executive 1: No, we don’t have enough fabric for pants. executive 2: What about shorts.  It’s getting warm and no one is doing shaggy shorts. executive 1: That’s because shaggy shorts are crazy. executive 2: Just call it edgy and all the fashionistas will want to wear it. executive 1: Good idea, and have them add some scraps of old chiffon to get rid of that too. And that is the only rational way these monstrosities could have been created. Wool ruffle shorts, on sale for $50.00 from $100.00 at Topshop. View high resolution

This is how I imagine the conceptualization of these shorts occured:

Topshop executive 1: Those shaggy sweaters did well for us, but we have this left over fabric.  What should we do with it?

Topshop executive 2: What about pants?

executive 1: No, we don’t have enough fabric for pants.

executive 2: What about shorts.  It’s getting warm and no one is doing shaggy shorts.

executive 1: That’s because shaggy shorts are crazy.

executive 2: Just call it edgy and all the fashionistas will want to wear it.

executive 1: Good idea, and have them add some scraps of old chiffon to get rid of that too.

And that is the only rational way these monstrosities could have been created.

Wool ruffle shorts, on sale for $50.00 from $100.00 at Topshop.

Sequin shorts by Ashish, exclusively at Selfridges for approximately $660.51. Whether you call it soccer or football, these shorts are tragic no matter where you live.

Sequin shorts by Ashish, exclusively at Selfridges for approximately $660.51.

Whether you call it soccer or football, these shorts are tragic no matter where you live.

Brown leather corset shorts by Alexander Wang, $725.00 at Barney’s. Now, I have never been to a Renaissance Fair, but this is what I imagine ye olde prostitutes to wear.

Brown leather corset shorts by Alexander Wang, $725.00 at Barney’s.

Now, I have never been to a Renaissance Fair, but this is what I imagine ye olde prostitutes to wear.

Dhoti pants by Antipodium, on sale for $181.35 at Buy Definition. This takes me back to my college days.  You know, that white guy with the dreads who sits on the quad playing the bongos.  Let’s not bring this to the mainstream.

Dhoti pants by Antipodium, on sale for $181.35 at Buy Definition.

This takes me back to my college days.  You know, that white guy with the dreads who sits on the quad playing the bongos.  Let’s not bring this to the mainstream.

Destroyed jeans with attached lining by 7 for all Mankind, $198.00 at Tobi. Are we - the fashion buying public - so lazy that brands are now pre-layering our denim and leggings?  Or do they just think we are?

Destroyed jeans with attached lining by 7 for all Mankind, $198.00 at Tobi.

Are we - the fashion buying public - so lazy that brands are now pre-layering our denim and leggings?  Or do they just think we are?

Leather hotpants by Dsquared2, $225.00 at Yoox. Tight leather underwear, I can smell the yeast infection now.

Leather hotpants by Dsquared2, $225.00 at Yoox.

Tight leather underwear, I can smell the yeast infection now.

Sequined shorts by Ashish, $671.42 at Browns fashion. Nothing classes up a pair of elastic waistband, Hawaiian print shorts like sequins.  Well, maybe chiffon.

Sequined shorts by Ashish, $671.42 at Browns fashion.

Nothing classes up a pair of elastic waistband, Hawaiian print shorts like sequins.  Well, maybe chiffon.

Knit shark shorts, $60.00 at Topshop. Submitted by Erica.  Is it just me, or do those cartoon sharks look absolutely miserable?  Perhaps they are miserable because they know their destiny is to adorn crotches.  Topshop acknowledges that these are basically underwear by calling them “pants” (British for panties), but at the same time, they put them in the shorts section, meaning they are to be worn outside.

Knit shark shorts, $60.00 at Topshop.

Submitted by Erica.  Is it just me, or do those cartoon sharks look absolutely miserable?  Perhaps they are miserable because they know their destiny is to adorn crotches.  Topshop acknowledges that these are basically underwear by calling them “pants” (British for panties), but at the same time, they put them in the shorts section, meaning they are to be worn outside.

Satin trimmed shorts by Marc Jacobs, $1,850.00 at Saks. These give a whole new meaning to X marks the spot.

Satin trimmed shorts by Marc Jacobs, $1,850.00 at Saks.

These give a whole new meaning to X marks the spot.

Shorts onesie by Opening Ceremony, on sale for $230.00 at Opening Ceremony. A friend submitted these unaware that they were already in my list of items to post.  Apparently, the folks over at Opening Ceremony caught one a repeat of Family Matters on Nickelodeon at 3:00 am and said, “Shit, the Urkel kid is on to something.”

Shorts onesie by Opening Ceremony, on sale for $230.00 at Opening Ceremony.

A friend submitted these unaware that they were already in my list of items to post.  Apparently, the folks over at Opening Ceremony caught one a repeat of Family Matters on Nickelodeon at 3:00 am and said, “Shit, the Urkel kid is on to something.”