Showing posts tagged Opening Ceremony
Wait wait wait.  It has an FUPA-creating elastic waistband and a superfluous diagonal boob sash and it is sold out. Opening Ceremony one shoulder pants, $320.00

Wait wait wait.  It has an FUPA-creating elastic waistband and a superfluous diagonal boob sash and it is sold out.

Opening Ceremony one shoulder pants, $320.00

One shouldered sports bra by Alexander Wang, $58.00 at Opening Ceremony Sports bras are ugly.  I live for mine when I work out but it is not something I want to take out as a fashion statement.  Wang had the brilliant idea of making an ugly, utilitarian undergarment even worse by making it outerwear and removing any function.  How are you supposed to wear this?  On the runway the pieces were styled in a way that would resemble an old timey hobo boxer if worn out in public. Now, if you are looking for the more authentic sports bra look, they also offer those for $72.00.  Because its not like you can’t get a real sports bra for cheaper.

One shouldered sports bra by Alexander Wang, $58.00 at Opening Ceremony

Sports bras are ugly.  I live for mine when I work out but it is not something I want to take out as a fashion statement.  Wang had the brilliant idea of making an ugly, utilitarian undergarment even worse by making it outerwear and removing any function.  How are you supposed to wear this?  On the runway the pieces were styled in a way that would resemble an old timey hobo boxer if worn out in public. Image and video hosting by TinyPic

Now, if you are looking for the more authentic sports bra look, they also offer those for $72.00.  Because its not like you can’t get a real sports bra for cheaper.

Studded canvas tote by Opening Ceremony for Alexander Wang, $125.00 at Opening Ceremony. Another one of what I not-so-affectionately call a cheap trick.  Opening Ceremony and Alexander Wang are pandering to those who cannot afford the trendy Rocco bag but still want to feel included in their exclusive world.  Is it entirely their fault for selling these insulting canvas totes for $125 bucks, when someone could find a real leather no-name bag for cheaper?  As long as there is a market, crap like this will keep popping up.

Studded canvas tote by Opening Ceremony for Alexander Wang, $125.00 at Opening Ceremony.

Another one of what I not-so-affectionately call a cheap trick.  Opening Ceremony and Alexander Wang are pandering to those who cannot afford the trendy Rocco bag but still want to feel included in their exclusive world.  Is it entirely their fault for selling these insulting canvas totes for $125 bucks, when someone could find a real leather no-name bag for cheaper?  As long as there is a market, crap like this will keep popping up.

Large troddel by Carolyn Massey, $160.00 at Opening Ceremony. What the hell is a troddel?  A quick googling brought me to WWII era German bayonet accessories, which scared the shit out of little Jewish me.  Further googling, however, lead to me realizing that “troddel” was simply German for “tassel”.  So, I guess I overreacted on the purpose of the “troddel”.  It is useless.  It is an ornamental tchotchke to throw on your purse or keychain.  A bauble that costs 160 bucks.

Large troddel by Carolyn Massey, $160.00 at Opening Ceremony.

What the hell is a troddel?  A quick googling brought me to WWII era German bayonet accessories, which scared the shit out of little Jewish me.  Further googling, however, lead to me realizing that “troddel” was simply German for “tassel”.  So, I guess I overreacted on the purpose of the “troddel”.  It is useless.  It is an ornamental tchotchke to throw on your purse or keychain.  A bauble that costs 160 bucks.

Blazer onsie, $225.00 at Opening Ceremony. Submitted by Erica.  This onesie is all business in the front. and diaper in the back.

Blazer onsie, $225.00 at Opening Ceremony.

Submitted by Erica.  This onesie is all business in the front.

and diaper in the back.

Slip on clog, $445.00 at Opening Ceremony. I spent entirely too much time trying to figure out how these stay on.  Eventually, I did realize there was a strap to hold the foot in, but I am still questioning why.  They are like a humorless version of McQueen’s brilliant lobster shoes.  I may be alone in this emotion, as OC sells three different versions of these shoes.  Someone has to have thought they were a great idea.

Slip on clog, $445.00 at Opening Ceremony.

I spent entirely too much time trying to figure out how these stay on.  Eventually, I did realize there was a strap to hold the foot in, but I am still questioning why.  They are like a humorless version of McQueen’s brilliant lobster shoes.  I may be alone in this emotion, as OC sells three different versions of these shoes.  Someone has to have thought they were a great idea.

Shorts onesie by Opening Ceremony, on sale for $230.00 at Opening Ceremony. A friend submitted these unaware that they were already in my list of items to post.  Apparently, the folks over at Opening Ceremony caught one a repeat of Family Matters on Nickelodeon at 3:00 am and said, “Shit, the Urkel kid is on to something.”

Shorts onesie by Opening Ceremony, on sale for $230.00 at Opening Ceremony.

A friend submitted these unaware that they were already in my list of items to post.  Apparently, the folks over at Opening Ceremony caught one a repeat of Family Matters on Nickelodeon at 3:00 am and said, “Shit, the Urkel kid is on to something.”

Fringe bra cup dress by G.V.G.V, on sale for $373.00 at Opening Ceremony Upon seeing this, a friend of mine commented that this dress looks like the slutty version of a Where the Wild Things are costume.  The so-called ‘fringe’ looks like fur, and I can’t think of many women who would want fur on their nipples and stomach.

Fringe bra cup dress by G.V.G.V, on sale for $373.00 at Opening Ceremony

Upon seeing this, a friend of mine commented that this dress looks like the slutty version of a Where the Wild Things are costume.  The so-called ‘fringe’ looks like fur, and I can’t think of many women who would want fur on their nipples and stomach.

Lace hat with gloss brim by Bland, $215.00 at Open Ceremony. Nothing says style like dressing like an ironic Japanese tourist.

Lace hat with gloss brim by Bland, $215.00 at Open Ceremony.

Nothing says style like dressing like an ironic Japanese tourist.